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                                                                                    Global Abuse Zine (issue #1,1990)

1990 Interview with Paul Ramirez (Drums)
By: Jason Combes

1. What's the line-up for the band and what instruments do you play? When did the band form? What are your ages?
Me, Paul-drums (18), Ruben-gui/bass/vox (24), Sal-vox/chainsaws/trombone/harmonica(19). We formed from the remaining members of Cryptic Hatred. We formed 'coz bands like Napalm Death and shit bands like that claimed to be the fastest bands in the world-how modest?!!!? Everyone knows it's fucking Anal Cunt-the true fuckin' fast band!! (I agree-ed.) Seth's vocals totally rule!! Fred's guitars are total fuckin' shredding noise and Tim's drums, boy is that fucker fast! They were great live! Cool dudes too!! Our split will be heavy, we'll have our new equipment to fuck with, so all hell's gonna break loose!! Ha, Ha!

2. Who came up with the name "Splatterreah"? How does it relate to the band?
The name was total shit!! It's just something to go by. At least we aren't a bunch of trendy fat pussies in a band and call ourselvves Assuck!! The Rigid Rec. is the biggest joke label since Vernon's fat ass started it. You fucking sweaty fat pig!! Assuck's drummer is the only cool one! But the other trendy fat pussies are total shit talkin' backstabbers! Steve, you fat
prick-faced motherfucker, I'm gonna rape your mom's fat ass and wipe my dick on your Metallica shirt you fucking elephant, trendy, fat skate poser! Paul, your just a total dumb ass cocksucking loser-fuck off, you Napalm Death ass-kissing, homofied chunk of dolphin shit!! Lick the smegma out of your mom's clit you fucking shit talking Yugoslavian Pig.

3. Describe your music.
A total wall of noise!! I would compare to an old lady who drinks a gallon of prune juice, downs a pack of ex-lax, eats a couple dozen oranges, and eats 3 pineapples, trying to play the banjo, sitting on her rocking chair, trying not to take a shit.

4. Finish the sentence. Napalm death.......is the fastest band in the world!!!                                                                         When the "Shit-Crusher" tour came through the US, we all went to see Godflesh, and I guess N.D. thought we were there to see them-how pathetic! Anyway, since we were there, we deciced to talk a little shit. They only knew my name, so they were calling me a fat motherfucker, poser, and all of these other great terms, when they were talking about themselves! It was a great time!! We ruined the show for them and we left happily!!! Napalm Death is the fucking worst, even worse than all of those Florida bands!! Brutal Death Metal-how scary!

5. What bands are you into?
Venom, Hellhammer, Celtic Frost, Necrovore, Pentagram (Chi.), Nihilist, old Sepultura, Possessed, Mayhem (Nor.), Bathory, old Carcass, Warhammer, Rotting Corpse, Immolation, Godflesh, Ulcerous Phlegm, old Slayer, Satanic Malfunctions, Larm, Heresy, Sore Throat, Extreme Noise Terror, old Autopsy, Raw Noise, Mortician, old Terrorizer (mix rehs.), Fear of God, etc... I really like Death Metal, but I also like extreme HC. I hate the fuck out of bands like Grave, Abhorrence, Amorphis, Xysma, General Surgery, Demigod-they're all overnight bands that claim to be heavy!! To be honest, General Surgery sounds like Anthrax meets Carcass, but more of a riff stealing, rip off type way!! These bands have Marshalls, Ibanez guitars, there has to be a studio shit tricks, coz' I've never heard an Ibanez/Marshall that was heavy! What we do in the studio, we do live!

6. What are your lyrics about?
Hatred, violence, sewage, dismemberment, chainsaws, off shore drilling, assault with a deadly weapon, rainbows, little birds, etc. Any cool trendy death metal issue.

7. What do you do in your free time?
I attempt to go to college, working, and practicing on my drums. I also like to steal bikes from kids, throw cinder blocks at bums, hit people in the back of the head with claw hammers and take off running, sniff old ladies rocking chair cushions, and beat wino's for fun.

8. How do you feel about drugs such as LSD, Crack, Acid, etc.? Do you think using such things are necessary?
I don't think they are necessary, but they sure are cool!! If Mick Harris can drop acid and smoke weed, so can I!! I want to be cool too! I want people to look up to me!!

9. Tell me about your live 7" on Premature Entombment Rec..
Eric liked our shit, so he put it out! Our split L.P. will be out soon, so please be patient. Eric's really cool, not a dick over!

10. When will your split with Charred Remains be out?
I was told sometime in October or November, but I'll assure you our side will be better than our shitty ass little demos! If it doesn't come out like we want, we'll just cheat in the studio like Napalm Death or Terrorizer.

11. Tell me what it's like to experience Splatterreah live.
Lots of profanity, shit being thrown at us, boring crowds, Pestilince poser fans, and a complete wall of noise!! We were going to play in Pittsburgh, but the fuckheads who were setting it up were being fags about it, so they never called us again. I wish they'd learn how to set up shows!

12. Are there any cool noise bands in your area that we should know about?
Only Kruller, no one else is worth a shit around here. This place is a fucking shit hole!

13. Any last closing comments? Thanks Paul!!
All fake Death/Grind bands-fuck off!! Especially Finnish and newer Swedish bands. Thanks for the interview, no more shit for sale, thanx again for your time!! Evertyone, buy our split it will be the heaviest thing ever recorded!! Well, we're not Bolt Thrower, but it'll be heavier than that shit band!!